My greatest fear...

I live in fear of my phone. This may sound completely stupid but for me it is a serious issue. I live in fear of my phone because as soon as a certain person [who we shall name Bob for the sake of this rant] wakes up he texts me. He doesn't even text me because he has something to say, he just texts for the sake of texting...AT 9AM! I DON'T BLOODY WELL CONSIDER WAKING UP UNTIL 12!

I get this every single day so I text him back when I get out of bed and tell him I'd appreciate it if he didn't text me until after 2pm as I could still be asleep. Does he listen? NO!

Not only is it the ritual morning text I have to put up with. He's the kinda person that will text you every 5 minutes until you reply. I will be sitting there eating my dinner and in a space of 15 minutes Bob will have sent me 3 texts! It drives me insane. He's always texting me. I don't mind people texting me, I actually love texting people when we have a proper conversation going on but he doesn't have a proper conversation going on. He doesn't even say "hi, how are you?" He says something spazzified relating to a week old conversation we had. The most recent, and his apparent favourite, being "Pirate pawrn". I get woken up at 9am just so he can be a spaz and say "PIRATE PAWRN! LOOOOOOOL!" YEH IT WAS FUNNY AT THE TIME BUT YOU MADE IT SO UNFUNNY IT'S DIRE!

It's got to the stage that when I hear my text ring tone so off I feel like I die a little bit inside. Half the time I don't even have my phone with me just so I don't have to read some idiotic text with no meaning or humour in it.

But not having my phone with me doesn't solve my problem...ohhhh noooo! Because he has fucking MSN! As soon as I come online "HEY!" I want to throw my laptop to the floor and curl up in the corner crying. He is one of my good mates but he has pushed me to the point of having to block him on MSN when I can't face a mundane, pointless conversation. I am a prisoner on my own MSN, appearing offline 60% of the time because I have people I DON'T KNOW starting pointless conversations with me. I don't know you. I don't really want to know you. We have nothing in common. I don't know what to talk to you about. You're just wasting space on my menu bar dammit!

When doing a very scientific calculation with a very scientific formula I came to the conclusion that, due to the number of people I do want to talk to in comparison to the number of people I don't want to talk to, it is infact easier to just appear offline than individually block all these people.

It's times like these I actually feel that modern technology is a bit of a curse as it merely makes it harder for me to curl up in a dark corner and be by myself for a few hours. I don't wana turn my phone off because I always hope that I will be contacted by a desired person but this is a bit like tearing down the walls of your castle so your prince will find it easier to get to you. You're just making it easier for your enemies to get to you at the same time. *sighs*

I guess I can just continue to change my phone number and email address for the rest of my life. Yeh...that sounds like a plan...